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When Your Child Asks Hard Questions

It happens every other day or so, my quick-thinking, must-have-answers-to-everything little girl startling me with her tough questions. I should have known it was coming, because we had just spent the day at her school and in the hallway was a special needs student.

The most precious sweetheart you have ever seen, I am here to tell you.  I have seen him before, his teacher walking him around, her hand always on his elbow, trying to keep him as quiet as possible, his body stiff as he walks, unable to do what I’m sure he wishes it would do.  He looks to be around 17 or 18, I’m not quite sure, a young man trapped in a disabled body.  Groaning in a high-to-low pitch he tries to communicate.  And I have to give him credit, a shout out right here and now, for the fact that he makes the best eye contact compared to anyone else.

Most people mind their own day, their own children, a quick hello if anything at all.  But not this one.  He looks right at you with the biggest, most expressive eyes and he TRIES to say something.  And it can be uncomfortable for some, that urge to cringe, not because you don’t care, but because you don’t know what to say.

I should have seen it coming, her questions.

That night as I was tucking her in, after saying prayers, she looks at me and asks “What was wrong with that boy at school?”

I hung my head. I could see she was grasping that some children aren’t born the same as others, that some are born with physical problems. “It doesn’t seem fair!” she said.  “Why does God allow that?”

Oh boy. I will be honest.  I had no profound words that a 5-year-old would understand.  I did the best I could, told her that every one, no matter what we look like are precious and to be loved and accepted.  I wrapped my arms around her, thankful for what I was given.

What do you say?

I guess you’re never too young or old to wrestle with hard questions of faith.  Have you ever been pressed in with tough questions? Don’t ever give up wrestling for your faith. Life does have meaning … even if you have to search for it.

God will wipe every tear from their eyes …  Revelation 21:4

About Lindsey

is from the northern woods of Wisconsin where she lives a quiet life working as a medical editor. Highlights in life are family, books, writing, and especially a relationship with her Creator.

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6 comments

  1. It sure doesn’t feel fair sometimes. Because Adam and Eve sinned, sin, death, and destruction were brought into this world, and no one is perfect. We might have ‘owies’ on the outside or bruises on our insides, but we will not be entirely perfect until we get to heaven. For now, those who are physically able get to show Christ’s love by smiling, communicating, lifting, washing, and doing good to the weakest of God’s children. Persons with handicaps often have the most loving view of God you can ever find. They reflect that love in their interactions with others, and I often find the love of Christ beaming right back at me through my son’s eyes. (He has cerebral palsy and epilepsy) encourage love and kindness- we don’t know everything, but we know that is how Christ would have us act! Love ya Lindsey!

  2. I sure love you too and I agree, we don’t know everything, but we don’t need to. We just need to love. Also, God Bless all your babies!

  3. Amelia

    Children are just innocently curious. They are constantly trying to understand and make sense of the world they live in. Sometimes their questions are funny, but other times, they’re really hard. In those times, answers aren’t so forth-coming.

    And that’s why it’s so important to recognize that our actions speaks louder than words. As parents and role models, we have to lead with love and let our lives reveal Jesus and His love, so our little ones can learn and imitate us–even when we’re lost for words.

    • I couldn’t have (and didn’t!) said it any better than that Amelia … actions speak louder, lead by example, lead with love!

  4. Greg

    Lindsey,
    Very sensitive article. I have a specially needed son so I understand about your daughter asking the questions. I know first hand people look at my son like what is wrong with you. He is just trying to fit in and be accepted like any other human being.He is well-liked by people. Praise God for that.

    • Aww, Greg, it makes my heart happy to know he is well-liked. We are all just trying to fit in, that’s so true. No different than anyone else, not really. Thanks for the comment my friend.

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