God constantly surprises me. No matter how many times I see Him move or have a prayer answered, I am amazed every time. Last Sunday in church He did it again. On our way to church, I told my husband something I knew he was not going to like. I felt in my heart it was the right time. Needless to say, there was a definite charge in the air as he muttered, “I wish you hadn’t told me right now.” I said sorry but I knew it was the time as God had planned. Cause how many of you know God’s timing is perfect? Like everyone, we have family issues – some family members are estranged from us on both sides. God had recently laid on my heart a person who I owed at least another shot at mending fences, for both of our sakes. If I try and get rejected, I know I have tried, and if I try maybe she will understand that I do love her and want a relationship. I don’t want to think that I withheld something that I should have given.
My husband and I went into the sanctuary and made our way to our “usual” seats. There were a few words exchanged in whispers before the music began. As we worshipped the Lord with our voices in song, I had my arm through my husband’s and I was rubbing his hand. At some point I just wrapped my arms around him and hugged him. I knew he was struggling; I could feel it in my spirit.
My eyes were closed, but I sensed someone beside him. One of the men that he has a close relationship with had come over to him. He put his arm around my husband and began to talk and then pray. I could not hear a lot of what he was saying, but I knew it was God. I folded my hands in prayer and cried like a baby, saying, God you are so amazing. We left church and started to talk on the way home. After we arrived, we sat in the car talking for a long time. His attitude was 100% different and he gave his blessing on my effort and declared he would not hold me back.
When we walked into church he was saying, “Send her a text telling her if I catch her on my property, I will have her arrested.” As we sat in the car talking he said to me, “She is welcome any time and if she doesn’t want to see me, I won’t be around.”
God amazes me. God amazes me. I think, sometimes, that it is lack of faith on my part, but actually it’s because I cannot wrap my head around the fact that the King of the universe cares enough for me to intervene on my behalf and to bless me.
Later I asked my husband what his friend had said, and my husband said that his friend came over to tell him God loves him and knew he was struggling. Sometimes there are no words to adequately express what I feel inside. Sometimes this- J – is all I can say.
His eye is on the sparrow (Matthew 10:29-31), and He watches over me.