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I have wasted so many years

“I have wasted so many years,” my heart cries as I glimpse the glory of God and think of how, so often, I make ‘faith’ what it is not.  I do what seems right; I drown out the voice of God with my own ‘good’ desires.  I trample His glory for work not assigned by Him.

Then, deep within, the sweet Spirit of God speaks:  “I have wasted none.”  I know it is the voice of God because it aligns with His Word.

Joel 2:25

Repentance is right, good, and necessary.  Repentance carries no despair or shame.  Though typically filled with tears, true repentance is sweet because the Spirit of God heals hurts caused by the sin now exposed to the Light.  The opening of the book of John includes a beautiful verse we must grasp:

John 1:5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

Our sin, our failures—our darkness—does not quench the Light of Jesus Christ.  He is greater than our mistakes, greater than our best efforts.  Condemnation only comes when we prefer our darkness to His Light (John 3:19)

Condemnation is not where God wants the believer to live.  The devil uses shame to separate us from the sweet Spirit of God.  We allow pride to keep us there.  That is what ‘preferring darkness’ looks like.  Satan’s fall began with “I will…” and he wants us to use the same words.  No matter how hard we work, no matter how many great things we do, we have no righteousness without Jesus Christ.  That truth is not a condemnation because the Light is all around us!

Jesus promises that those who believe (trust) in Him will do greater works than He.  That is a pretty daunting statement, isn’t it?  Jesus also said that the works He did were not done by Him but by the Father.  That seem secret must be ours.  Those things we can measure are usually of this world.  We put our hearts into knowing more and doing more; such works are of our flesh.  The things that God does are things only He can do.  Our obedience to what He tells us—in His Word and in our Spirit—opens the door for Him to do the greater works He longs to do.

The Holy Spirit gently convicts us of our errors.  He points out disobedience and disrespect.  He calls us to humble our hearts and bow before the King.  He never shames or condemns, but He is always calling us to receive more Light.  His presence is sweet; won’t you welcome Him into your darkness today?

Where is the Spirit asking you to allow Light in?

About Billie Jo

Billie Jo is wife to Craig and mom to Rusty and Riesa. Formerly employed in the human service industry, the past fifteen years have been dedicated to homeschooling. She is a freelance writer for a number of print and internet publications. She is also passionate about serving in the community. She works in a GED preparation ministry and a community-based servant program that provides opportunities for youth to serve others. It is passion for the love of Jesus and His transforming work that motivates her writing and serving. "I love to see God at work in the lives of others and this is the way I see best."

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