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The Importance of Seeking the Lord Before Dating

Dating is not always a fun thing. As a single mom I’ve found it to be extremely difficult. Maybe it’s because I’m older and wiser. I’m more prepared to turn down an invitation if a man isn’t committed to his faith in Christ. That is something that hasn’t always been easy for me because for the first 23 years of my life I lived through my eyes and flesh.

It’s also not easy to be a Christian and admit that I’m divorced. After all, God says how much He hates divorce. After the divorce I asked God to keep all men away from me that were not good for me. Well I can certainly attest that He has held His end of the bargain.

God has given me a few rules for dating and until recently I thought they were just good pieces of advice. I have been tempted to lower those standards but God gently reminds me what is good for me. Our eyes can deceive us but when we pray, the Lord will guide. That is something that we can rest easy in.

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not to your own understanding.”
Proverbs 3:5

I am in love with Jesus; I need a man that is willing to devote his professional and personal reputation to God. In the past it has been very clear that I cannot bend these rules. I love Jesus with all that I am and any man who does not have the same drive for Jesus will not understand my life and will end up hating me. I know that this is true because that is one of the reasons that I am divorced.

A good standard I have found is if you are interested in dating someone, talk to them about Jesus and see what their reaction is. Ask about their church and what they most like about it.

I know that the man God has for me will be a man that first follows God. I also know that:

1) He will love Jesus above all things.

2) He will pray for and with me.

3) He will know that all of God’s commands are vital and not mere guidelines.

Whether you are waiting for your dream wife or husband, I pray that you seek what the Lord has for you. We all have precious lives and while you wait the Lord is doing wonderful things through you–while you wait.

Psalm 37:4 says, “Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” This is a verse that I cling to when I think about my singleness. When we seek the Lord’s word as we read the Bible or talk to him through prayer we will get to see what desires are good, pure, and lovely. Not just our own fleshly desires but desires that the Lord has given us.

If you are single, take the time to spend time with the Lord so that when you encounter a good thing you will know it is from the Lord.

Waiting is not time wasted and I’d love to know what is one thing you’ve learned during your time of waiting?

About Sarah Malcangi

Sarah loves Jesus and is unashamed to tell the world about His truth and bold love! Her purpose is to encourage others to seek the truth as they pursue who they are in Christ. She is also a Mom and feels blessed to call Colorado her home.

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  1. Ashley Isaacson

    I really liked what you had to say here. I am learning that it is really truly The Lord that must bring marriage about or you are better off without, because so many things must be right, and The Lord MUST be central in the relationship.

    I just had some work done on a new used car and about 2 weeks later, started to hear an unnatural sound. It made me think how a bad marriage (or marrying someone God hadn’t confirmed) was like being stuck in a loan with a lemon of a car – constantly something coming up to deal with, lingering doubts, wondering how long it was going to last, or if the dang thing was even worth all the hassle.

    I’ve also wondered whether God is up to something, seeing what we don’t, because I’ve met many lovely youngish Christian woman who are “waiting.” What’s the deal?

  2. Thanks for the comment and you are right. The Lord must bring that correct person into our lives or it just won’t work. I wish I knew more about why some of us must wait so long. 🙂

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