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The Proverbs 31 Man

It is the desire of many women to follow the model laid out in Proverbs 31. However, do you realize that the scripture is addressing men as well? In fact, it is a prophecy of a mother being handed down to her son, King Lemuel, and it is a beautiful one at that. It is no wonder that the Holy Spirit guided Solomon to include these words in the book of Proverbs.

Today I’m going to briefly look at what “men” can take from this chapter and how we can use it to help women fulfill their desire to become Proverbs 31 women. You see, a woman cannot do this on her own; nor did God intend for her to have to. So let’s get started.


A Proverbs 31 woman is certainly looked at as a very strong woman, but a man is called to be strong as well. Not only for his wife, but for his entire family and those around him. You see, men are meant to be warriors. Now this can take on different forms, but we see here that it’s referring to a strength that can even take down kingdoms. What I believe this is suggesting is that men are to be masculine, and not “wimps” who glory in passivity.

Proverbs 31:3 Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.

The Seeker

As we go further into Proverbs 31, we see that is poses a question. This question is not for the ladies, but rather the men. Let’s take a look at it…

Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

Wow! Now those are some heavy words. We’re being told that finding a Proverbs 31 woman is like a treasure hunt, and when you find this amazing woman, her value surpasses that of the finest jewels. This is what us men need to desire. We shouldn’t settle for a woman who refuses to be virtuous!


Once a man finds this precious woman, he is to put his trust in her and not waiver on believing in her ability to function within the family. You can be secure in her, and she will never do you wrong.

Proverbs 31:11-12 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.


Now this is a tough one for many men, but the Proverbs 31 man needs to have a certain level of dependence in relation to his mate. He needs to allow her the chance to care for him and provide for the family. And why not? Many women are very capable providers! This doesn’t mean a man can’t provide for his family as well, but he should share this role with his wife.

Proverbs 31:15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

Proverbs 31:21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.


One of the characteristics of the Proverbs 31 man is that he is known by others in the community. This entails several things to include spirituality, wisdom, and fellowship. These things occur when you have a proper relationship with the Lord, which also means having a healthy fear of Him (Proverbs 9:10).

Proverbs 31:23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.


The final component of the Proverbs 31 man is that he needs to be someone who esteems his mate so much that he praises her and calls her blessed. Of course! She is many amazing things, so why not speak kindly to her and uplift her up emotionally. This is not only the right thing to do, but it is also chivalrous, and will encourage her to continue being a Proverbs 31 woman.

Proverbs 31:28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

Final Thought

Friends, I know I tackled this chapter from a male perspective, but if you really think about it, isn’t Proverbs 31 more about family than who we are as individuals? There is give and take in this chapter that comes from all parts of the family. Sure, we typically focus in on the woman here, but it’s a family effort that helps her develop and maintain this esteemed title. Please take a little extra time to read and apply this chapter to your life. You won’t be sorry. Thank you for reading and God bless.

What characteristics do you need to work on to become a Proverbs 31 man or woman?

About Joel Bauer

Joel M. Bauer is a 49-year-old U.S. Army Veteran from Dunn, NC, which is just outside of Raleigh. After being honorably discharged from the U.S. Army, he attended school at Taylor University, a Christian liberal arts school, in Fort Wayne, IN, where he received his BS in social work and psychology. He has worked in such places as a homeless shelter, a community based treatment center for severe mental illnesses, a school for troubled students, and other social service agencies. His current endeavor is to build The Bottom Line website into a site that inspires both Christians and non-Christians alike, and brings glory to God.

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  1. Great article! The title kind of made me chuckle because I am used to thinking of a woman in this verse, but I liked your inclusive perspective.

  2. Thanks Ashley. I’m glad you liked it and got a good chuckle out of the title. 🙂 God bless.

  3. I love this. I never thought about it this way. Great read for guys. As a single lady, this kind of man is who I seek. Thanks for this perspective.

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