When two people decides to stay committed in a marriage union, it can be a beautiful experience. But the experience isn’t just beautiful by chance, both individuals in the union have to work hard to create the beauty. Sometimes the persistent, unwanted behavior of a spouse may sabotage the relationship. And whether it’s done consciously or unconsciously, the end result can be devastating. Here are the top five worst things you can do your marriage:
Be Jealous & Clingy
Jealousy in a relationship is almost always as a result of the absence of trust and the presence of insecurities. One of the worst things you can do, is deny your partner his/her breathing space. If you’re always checking your spouse’s phone, briefcase or purse, among other things, pretty soon your husband/wife will feel like a prisoner instead of a partner. Also, if you insist on always doing everything together, then you’ll leave the other person feeling suffocated. And sooner rather than later, they’ll have to breathe.
Be Selfish & Self-absorbed
The minute you join hands in marriage, it’s no longer all about you. Instead, you have to incorporate the words “us” and “we” in your vocabulary—and in your actions too. When you make decisions that are only beneficial to you, you’re robing your spouse of the full marriage experience. The union entails joining together as one (Genesis 2:24) and sharing everything, both the good and bad things. Life isn’t Burger King, you can’t always have it your way.
Belittle Your Spouse
One of the last things you should consider doing, is putting down your husband/wife. If you keep treating your significant other like he/she is worthless and unimportant, don’t be surprise when he/she starts gravitating to someone else who treats them with respect. Nobody is perfect, so there’s no reason to throw your partner’s weaknesses in their face. If this is a trend, separation might be the next option.
Let In-laws Takeover
When you took those vows at the altar, it was between you and your marriage partner—not you and the in-laws. It’s okay to seek advice and guidance from in-laws, but be mindful of how much you’re going and how much they’re meddling. They shouldn’t dictate what happens in your relationship. Contrary to popular belief, they don’t have to know about every little squabble that takes place in the union. In-laws can be a great asset, but if you let them, they can also become the wedge between you and your partner. The same goes for your spouse’s in-laws.
Be a Control-freak
If you are the kind of spouse who gloats over control, and takes pride in shouting commands at your wife/husband, a happy home will be fleeting. Marriage is about loving and cherishing each other, not treating each other like possessions. It shouldn’t be about telling the other when to go out, who to go with, where to go, and what to do. Doing so will steal that person’s individuality, leaving him/her empty and drained. The last thing you want is the shell of a person who once was your wife/husband.
Always strive to build a happy home, but remember that happy homes are made up of happy couples. If each person in a marriage union aim to make their partner happy, then the results will be favorable. Don’t try to give 50 percent, because it implies your best is dependent on your partners 50 percent. Instead, give a 100 percent, that way you’re demonstrating unconditional love and is always giving your best.
What would you describe as one of the top worst things to do in a marriage?