Having A Spirit Of Gentleness

We may interact at times with difficult people. There are Christians on different levels of spiritual maturity. There are those who are carrying around things from their past. Change does not happen all at once. Wrong habits, or a particular way of living can make life stressful for others or annoy us. This can be true at work, in the family, or even within church congregations. People have different personalities or alternative lifestyles that as the saying goes, “rub us the wrong way.” There are emotional and relational hurts that negatively impact interaction with others.

In all of the above cases, there needs to be a spirit of gentleness and forbearance. There must be an openness to see others as flawed human beings in need of God ‘s grace. This has been an ongoing struggle for me as I’m sure it has for many people. Emotions must be held in check so one does not react in anger or in destructive ways. It takes a large dose of self-control and forbearance.

The psychological definition of forbearance is the “ability to endure difficulties, provocation, or other misdeeds with patience and self-control. It involves a conscious choice to refrain from immediate negative reactions like anger, retaliation, or avoidance.”

Dr. Thomas K. Swisher, professor emeritus at Stevenson University, says, “it reflects strength in responding thoughtfully rather than impulsively…Rooted in empathy and emotional regulation, forbearance fosters healthy relationships and personal growth by allowing space for reflection and reconciliation.”

The Bible has something to say about this. Ephesians 4:3 says, “With all humility and gentleness with patience, bear with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace.” Colossians 3:12 adds, “put on compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another, and if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive, and above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”  The Greek meaning of forbearance is “holding back, delay, or self-restraint.”

It is not easy at times to interact with difficult people or ones that bring stress into our lives because of the way they behave or live. It takes divine supernatural strength to respond to them without losing control of our emotions. That is where the power of the Holy Spirit of God comes in to exhibit the new nature in Christ. The fruit of the spirit is listed in Galatians 5:22. “Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.”

When you or I am having trouble dealing with difficult people, let us call upon the power of the Holy Spirit to exhibit his qualities in our life in response to them. Do you have anyone in your life right now that is difficult to deal with? Ask God to know how to respond to them.