Winning His Heart
A few years ago a good friend shared with me a verse that grated along my mind the same way nails do on a chalkboard. “Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives” (1Peter 3:1). At first I had images of dogs rolling over onto their backs submitting to their masters. Then, I imagined a top of the totem pole 21st century workingwoman with a “Whatever” attitude as she walked back into her office and closed the door.
Yet my perceptions of this small word “submit” were not even close to God’s definition. Looking back, I was even okay with the “winning my husband part over”, but frankly, I despised the first part of the verse because it meant only one thing for me. Change. God was calling me to get rid of my prideful and selfish heart so that I would willingly mold into His desire for my life.
I headed to my trusted Webster’s dictionary to find out for myself what this word “submit” really means. This so called horrendous word to a twenty-first century woman is defined as: to accept, yield to a superior force, authority, or will. In translation, I am to yield to my husband’s authority in my life as I do to my heavenly father. “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord”(Ephesians 5:22).
Now just wait a minute before you get too upset and turn away just let me explain. It does not state to let your husband walk all over you, or verbally or physically hurt you in any way. ”In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—(Ephesians 5:27-29)… However, “each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. “(Ephesians 5:33) Catch the last part of the verse? Wives-we must R.E.S.P.E.C.T our husbands. Not just love them, but respect them. (For more information on what this means, check out Dr. Eggerich’s book titled Love and Respect.) When we submit ourselves to our husband, we are in turn yielding to God and his desire for us. By accepting this notion, we are not making ourselves any lesser of a woman nor are we downplaying our role in life, but we are allowing God to change us and to follow the hierarchy that he has created for us to keep order.
Wives, do you want your husband to become a courageous man of God? Then, submit and respect your husband and his authority. As unnatural as what we are taught, submitting to our husband’s will not only allows our marriage to grow, but we are also allowing our husband to become the righteous man of God that he has been created to be. Anything less than yielding is defiance and disobedience towards God.